The Beauty and Grotesque of a Common Life - Monday

from the suicide attempt survivor's journal:

Sometimes I feel they should call it Mooday. Maybe because I felt a compelling urge to moo at people, seeing them so dumb and irritating in their typical Monday mood, with the same old 'I hate Mondays' attitude, as if their royal entities should be entitle to something better. I  wished I was invisible so that I could practice some good old kancho on their sorry asses, even better, kancho the shit out of their sorry asses, then smearing a bit of brown material on their face and laugh my ass off while enjoying their disgusted, confused and enraged reactions. 

I don't even remember much of how it all went at the office, I was so busy procrastinating and holding back on insulting my co-workers. I actually got tired doing that. It must have been all the concentration and effort I put into avoiding myself, the others and mostly responsibility, so I mentally curled up and zone out all that shit.

This is complete bullshit. I really not up for this. I think it'ks the very first time I actually look forward to my Wednesday therapy session, so I can download all the crap building up inside me into my therapist's lap. Enough for today. Fuck that and fuck her too (but that's another story). NO picture, either!

                                              "There is no hope, why don't you pull the plug?"
                                                                             Chuck Schuldiner - Pull the plug

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